Black Men, We Need You More!



Dear Black Man,

We as Black women hear you. We understand that you need us, for that need was determined at the dawn of creation. We’ve been clear on our purpose, our role, and our responsibility. We’ve shouldered our weight, and in many instances, your burden too. But…

It’s time YOU recognize your power and your worth.
It’s time YOU reclaim your rightful place in our hearts and in our homes.
It’s time YOU protect and guard us, recognizing that we’re valued and more precious than rubies.
It’s time YOU teach our boys to be kings and our girls to be queens.
It’s time YOU fight against injustice and stand for truth and honor.
It’s time YOU serve as the priest of your homes.

We recognize that you need us, but you need to recognize that we’ve been here all along. However, more than needing us, you need to be the man God destined you to be. We, as Black woman, will gladly:

Follow you if you LEAD
Support you if you openly SHARE
Trust you if you are TRUSTWORTHY
Please you if you show RESPECT
Stand by your side if you STAY
Praise you if you’re REPUTABLE
Encourage you if you’re MOTIVATED
Surrender our all to you as you give your all to God and SUBMIT
Adore you unconditionally if you learned how to LOVE


We recognize the battles you fight. But, you’ve incorrectly identified your greatest enemy. Yes society painted you as worthless, shiftless, and useless. And yes the government is structured to hold you back and keep you down. And yes ‘the man’ despises, loathes and spurns you and the very ground you walk on. And yes, we, the Black woman, sometimes are angry and want to give up on you. But, these are not your greatest enemy. Your greatest enemy is YOU.

Worthless, Shiftless, Useless —— Only if you believe that you are
Held Back and Downtrodden —– Only if you lay down and stay down
Despised, Loathed and Spurned —– Only if you care about another man’s opinion of you
Misunderstood and Abandoned —– Only if you push us away and fail to walk in your destiny

The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step. Our beloved, Black brother, we need you to take the first step. We’ll never love or support you enough to help you be the man you need to be. Change can only come about as you take the first step.

We’ve loved you then and we love you still. We’ve always loved you and we always will. Let our love serve as the launch pad from which you fly and then soar.
From My Heart to Yours,
Davenia Lea, Ph.D.

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7 Responses
  1. It’s interesting how this only had six comments with no hatred spews whatsoever while the other similar article had hundreds of messages of pure hate. It’s unfortunate but that’s what ideology has done to us.

  2. This could be very enlightening for those who are not aware of the time and sacrifices woman make. They are the glue that holds families together. God Bless them all.

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  4. Oooh..if my brother can see this beautifully written piece.

    I loved how you wrote this..without hate and separation. These are the exact words that I would tell my son ( if I had one ) or any Black man who needs spiritual guidance.You still speak about love for Black men.

    Regardless of the trials and tribulations we go through with each other, it never made me hate Black men..or Black people in general. I’m sorry..but I just cannot see myself doing that.No matter how angry I may get with him…that love remains because that us what love..and self all about.

    • Sir Jolly NOble Reply

      Is good to know you don’t let your anger take the best path of you………..i would like to get know you miss or mrs ESSA if you don’t mind inbox me on facebook sirjolly noble

  5. Ololade Shonubi Reply

    Hmmm! What a word for those who can think. Thanks your for your wonderdul insight. Men should always understand that no matter how small or insignificant a woman may be in their sight, she deserves to be respected. This is because we were cared for by women (our mothers), so that we may live and survive, even whee we were at our most vulnerable stage as babies. Thanks to our mothers, thanks to our wives. Weitten on behalf of men who care and wish to cacre.

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